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Carrie Not the Kind of Girl You'd Marry

Stories & Snippets by Carrie Maclennan

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A big blue bean + hundreds of little circles. (Still at it. Though I need to get better pens with nibs + ink that don’t bleed and feather all over the place 🤷🏻‍♀️). Person: What’ve you been up to? I went outside. It was great. I *might* do it again sometime. Just, y’know, busy drawing thousands of tiny circles... This is my job now? I don’t *think* I’d seen this photo of my mum before until my sister shared it earlier this morning. Maybe I had, I dunno - but I mean, seriously. How cool is she? Anyway. I haven’t seen my wee mum since February 2020. I had plans to surprise her around Mother’s Day this time last year but plans fell apart because, well, you know... Now that she’s had her jabby jab (as have my sister and her family), I’m counting down the weeks and months til travel-for-fun restrictions + staying-overnight-in-someone-else’s-house-just-cos-you-wanna rules are lifted. What a visit it’ll be! Her eating coffee + walnut cake, me drinking gin from a can and both of us only half watching the Murder She Wrote marathon on telly in between armchair naps. Cannot. Wait. Thinking of everyone who’s missing their mum today and thinking myself lucky to have landed such a good ‘un and to be able to look ahead to future visits x #kowtowcommunity Also, interesting (?) development. I’m going through a dark phase. Wearing an unusual-for-me amount of black. Also wearing gold v silver costume jewellery for the first time in my life. I blame Jared Leto. Velvet. Need more velvet*. I’ve been low level migraining all week. Committed to a 100% screen-free day yesterday to give my senses a rest. Instead of watching flickering lights on telly in the evening, we played boardgames. I won The Game of Life by amassing a fortune of more than £600k in under 2 hours. Tried today to use my money to pay my credit card bill. Barclaycard said they don’t accept Game of Life money. I’ve received similar responses from other companies and even some online shops. I mean, what’s the point? It’s nice to feel the sun on yer bum. My work room is transforming. I’m transforming it. I have clean white walls now. Clean, aside from the cracks and bubbles in the building, the odd greasy blu tac mark that just won’t cover. I have a black stripe now too. That’s new. Black tape on the picture rail brings an unexpected amount of joy, wow. I framed the greenhouse collage I made and then I printed out photographs of Chris Kraus and Eileen Myles off the internet and sat them on the bit of stripe directly above my desk. They’re supervising. P.S And yes, I got to take my lamp friend home from my office at The Standard, London. He was lonely.

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